"Continue reading after the jump!"

Of the many Internet phrases I've grown to despise, "Continue reading after the jump" is right at the top of my very long list.

ATTENTION ALL BLOGGERS AND WEB JOURNALISTS:

It is completely unnecessary for you to ever use this phrase! Web pages have been around for a few years now, and most readers do grasp the concept of having to scroll down in order to see the rest of the article.


More after the jump!

And who the Hell decided that a picture or banner ad interrupting the text should be universally referred to as a "jump" anyway? There's no jumping taking place; it's just a damned picture on a page!

Seriously. It makes me sick to see the way all you lemming-like people on the Internet unquestioningly adopt and use such meaningless phrases. You're destroying our language and culture, and you're too stupid to even notice or care.

Tattooed Swedish Devil Girls Strike Again! Second Male Bicyclist Sexually Molested!

I really hate blogs.

Blogs suck. I hate almost everything about them, especially the fact that every damned blogger out there feels the need to incessantly fill their blog posts with links to other blogs. This can be very exhausting, because any given blog post will generally have some sensationalistic headline that grabs your eye under false pretenses, such as "Tattooed Swedish Devil Girls Strike Again! Second Male Bicyclist Sexually Molested!"



So you read the damned blog entry, and it only gives you a little taste of the story, because the blogger himself is far too lazy to actually write something of substance. Instead, they briefly summarize the non-event referenced in the headline and then provide you with multiple links. This is very aggravating, because the sources to which they link inevitably do the same damned thing! So just in trying to follow one story, you find yourself bouncing all over the cursed Internet.

What a waste of time!

To bloggers everywhere, I have this to say:

FUCK YOU!